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The Superficial
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Mimi Smartypants
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plumwin at gmail dot com
2005-03-03
What a face lift! at 1:07 p.m.
Vagina stories are always funny. There are many amusing qualities about this article. For one, that it was just presented with today's news as if we'd all been wondering about it. Like I was just thinking "Hmmm, I wonder if it will rain today AND I wonder what to do with my sagging vagina." Also funny is that the doctor in the story is from the Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute. How come I didn't know about this place? I could really just go on and on about the quotes (I felt like my uterus would fall out) and the whole 'vaginal face life' theory in general but just read it yourselves. It made me smile.
What a face lift! at 1:07 p.m.
I've been sick since Monday. It sucks. My head still feels like a giant ball of cotton and I can't wrap my thoughts around much. But, I felt the need to at least report in these fun tidbits.
Vagina stories are always funny. There are many amusing qualities about this article. For one, that it was just presented with today's news as if we'd all been wondering about it. Like I was just thinking "Hmmm, I wonder if it will rain today AND I wonder what to do with my sagging vagina." Also funny is that the doctor in the story is from the Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute. How come I didn't know about this place? I could really just go on and on about the quotes (I felt like my uterus would fall out) and the whole 'vaginal face life' theory in general but just read it yourselves. It made me smile.
I think it goes without saying that the theory that certain names imply that you will become a stripper later in life is true. Bird and I were just talking about this earlier. Someone else's blog referred to a child who was destined to be topless. Bird suggested that the unnamed name must be Brandy. I have to agree and then I ran across this story which made me crack up.
Real quick: To the stringy haired woman in front of me at Washington Mutual earlier: Shut up! Just shut up already! You held up the whole line because you had a check not written to you and you were trying to cash it. When the teller questioned you, you replied "Oh, she's from southern California so she's stupid." My god, did you think that would explain the situation? We all heard you and we all wanted to smack you. Plus, it was noon on a Thursday and you were in sweats. Get a job you idiot.
To the tree trimmer (the name of the company was on your shirt) who asked me out on my walk back: No, I will not date you. You can't ask me out on a street corner when your eyes are so red you can barely open them and I can smell the pot wafting from your car. Stay in your league.
And lastly, to the idiot in the 1986 Olds Cutlass with the front seat situated all the way in the back. Yes, that used to be cool. In 1986. Those were some cool guys. It's not cool anymore and that whole 'look' is out.
The cat! The cat!